Posts Tagged metal

V/A | Female Fronted Heavy Metal: 1976-1989

femalemetalcover-valilisa

So I wrote a few reviews of internet mixtapes some of which after they weren’t available for download anymore. Who knows why I do things? Well, here is a massive multi-volume offering that as of this writing you can actually hear for yourself.

I argue this project is actually more essential than the one that inspired it: Kangnave’s Reference of Female Fronted Punk. (Also amazingly still available, but get on it quick if you haven’t.) Punk is hardly gender-balanced performer-wise, but much more so than Metal, and besides, there’s nothing conceptually about Punk to exclude women, where Metal is commonly seen as realm of the Manly Man and/or the Womanly Man. Often the female voice, when present, is in the form of a backup singer who isn’t even in the band. Recently, we’ve seen Female-led Metal bands like Arch Enemy become hugely successful (in Europe), but it’s important to remember they’ve existed almost since the birth of the genre.

Over a period of a few years (2010-13) the Female Fronted Heavy Metal blogspot added volume after volume to the series, reaching 15 in all. It seems safe to say the project is complete. I’m not sure if it’s fully exhausted every single example because I’m not prepared to do dig further than guy has (it was a guy), but looking for full albums by some of these bands I really like will be work enough for me.

I’m tempted to run down all my favorites but I’ll be here all night. And what’s the point? You’ll find a lot to like yourself, if what you like is Metal. I’m mostly interested in the Japanese bands, I think none of which I had heard of before. Guy’s crawling all-Japanese message boards to find these. There’s even a Korean band. (Only a handful of the American bands were familiar to me: Leather, Bitch, Crisis, 45 Grave, Warlock/Doro, Girlschool, and of course, Heart.) I have mostly gone for stuff from the 90s and later in my general Metal listening (except for the big obvious bands), but the genre gets murky or extreme (if you go for the latter, highly recommend the Hymns to the Dead Goddess podcast). A lot of this old stuff is pretty good. If you’re a fan of the Fenriz mixes, or you’re just…old, you know there’s a lot of good, obscure stuff from the era. (There may even be some overlap.) But some of these bands are really forgotten. Some of the people in these bands probably forgot. This is a public service right here.

The sound quality is decent until disc 8. It’s not all lo-fi after that, but there’s some deep, deep cuts. Vinyl and cassette rips, some warped, some live bootlegs of bands probably formerly only rumored to have existed. Rehearsal tapes? There really should be a book.

%

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

No Comments

Numerical Notation: A Minor Threat

Minor_Threat_-_Out_of_Step Hoo boy. Year of the Sheep, right? Some people only seem to notice when it’s a “cool” animal like a dragon or a snake. We have a name for these people: DILETTANTES. There’s nothing cool about sheep, except this Minor Threat cover, so get used to seeing that I guess. But wait, it’s the Year of the Ram, isn’t it? Rams are cool. What with the head-butting and…that’s it. It’s enough. Give rams a chance. Or goats, who cares.

But I’m not here to review Minor Threat. Or talk about astrology. I’ve listened to enough Minor Threat for a lifetime (since I bought the Complete Discography on CD, in 2006) and it’s unlikely to make it back in rotation, unlike the Chinese Zodiac which repeats every twelve years…of course.

Forget all this happened.

Shit, that’s still the title isn’t it. Look, I’m gonna explain.

I’ve made a system of numerical notation. I call it Numerical Notation. The notes of the chromatic scale are given the number 0-11, starting with A.

In this system, if you care about the Modes (which you should, if you care about why there is a lettered system) the Aeolian mode, or A Minor, is the base scale, not C Major(the Ionian). It’s debatable that A Minor was historically, originally the more important. I think it sounds better. That’s not important. The important thing is to make this a non-vague point. Because I have noticed some other examples using notes for numbers starting with C as 0. I even said in earlier posts that you might as well do this if it makes more sense, but it doesn’t, in the big picture, and I’m gonna make the case that this is not some kind of arbitrary nerd bullshit dicking-around.

Here we are then with example one:

The sharp/flat system has been primarily designed for use in the major/minor system; when speaking modally, it’s a lotta look, to quote a famous fashion designer. All the flats and sharps tend to obscure the simplicity […] We need a different system of talking about melody. If C is assigned the number 0, C# the number 1, all the way up to B = 11, we can study the system numerically, and also universally, as any tonic can be assumed. Zero can just as easily be G#, or E. Also, since the tonic can never change by our definition, it’s not necessary to include it. Here’s an example to show what I’m talking about.

C Mixolydian is C D E F G A Bb C. If we assume that C = 0, and continue from there, then C Mixolydian can also be described as 0 2 4 5 7 9 10 12.

This post is excellent and you should read the whole thing. I should read the whole thing. The point is that here is someone making essentially the same point as me, naming the notes 0-11 (12=0), but starting with C. (Note that is doesn’t predate my initial posts.) Not saying he stole it, but I also said it was an “open source” idea, which is a pretty dumb way to talk because it is not a computer program. But I guess that can be interpreted as “feel free to steal this idea”. I was drinking a lot at the time. It’s not like you can patent this kind of thing anyway.

But let’s run with the open source concept and say he explained the idea better. I’m gonna bring it back around and explain why it’s easier for everyone if A=0.

But first(second), example two:

0-11_terpstravid

This is from a video that goes on to explain a new type of keyboard layout for an experimental instrument called a Terpestra. Now this is the kind of thing you can patent and even sell. Good luck to him. Again, not saying he stole the idea. Even if he did, can you really expect drop-in citations in a video like this? It’s not relevant who came up with each idea in this kind of presentation. It’s also kind of an obvious idea once it’s out there. Not as obvious as starting with 1 tho.

But it’s about to get even more obvious. Check this out:

A a# B C c# D d# E F f# G g#

 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

C c# D d# E F f# G g# A a# B

Which one of these makes more sense? You might still pick C if you are already trained in music, but how would you explain that to a student? The letters and numbers should be going in the same direction. It’s intuitive.

If you never start, you can never branch out into other things, like the higher concepts these other guys are talking about and the simplest way is the best way to start.

So while you are thinking about all this, here’s a video of GWAR covering the Pet Shop Boys:

%

, , , , , , , ,

6 Comments

2014 Did Not Exist

Posted in: x
Posted in: RECORDS.
Posted in: list10

Saluton,

久しぶりね? Last year I promised (to myself, no one else really cares) a post every Wednesday. This is a full-on, objective failure that I feel I have to mention up front. I make no such promises this year (to an imagined audience); in fact, I’m going to tell you I’m giving up forever and then come back anyway. People love that.

I’ve never been and am unlikely to be, important as a music writer. However, I used to be the guy paying attention to music no one else was paying attention to. That’s no longer the case. Besides from other bloggers who have a legit professional craft that now regularly talk about Asian pop music with a straight face, it went pretty mainstream this year. Once people got used to stuff like PSY and Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, which, while good, is pretty much the exact sterotype of hyper goofiness the average person might expect, things seem to have settled down and it’s generally accepted that it’s not all like that. Earlier I even thought I found a band no one had written about, the unwieldily named ゲスの極み乙女。(Guess no Kiwami Otome), when I found a write up not in a blog but Time Out Chicago. Skipping right over the blogs now. Even Rolling Stone put K-pop’s Hyuna on their best videos list.

Well shit.

But forget about that. The big event for me as a person who writes things on the internet was the demise of the Robot Lounge, long running message board of Giant Robot Magazine. Giant Robot is kinda just a brand now that has some stores and art galleries and they finally redid their website to reflect this. The art and the toys and stuff used to just be a small part of Giant Robot, I think of it as just one of the eject-able lionhead/hands that just kinda floats in space now. Still cool, but it’s only a piece. GR encapsulated most of the things I was interested in from the late-90s on, and the board starting in late 2000 even more so. As cool as the magazine was, the board was more intellectual, funnier, and more filthy. Lacanian deconstruction (of J-pop videos), who Sammo Hung could beat in a real fight, and the joys of sex during menstruation could all be active threads on any given day.

I only write online because of the Robot Lounge. I would still be making my experimental art-music or whatever the hell it is I really do and posting it online, but I would be one of these yahoos with no ability to communicate socially, auto-sending direct messages on twitter: “Hi, I’m from [thing you’ve never heard of], I realize we live now in a world of unlimited free entertainment, but here’s more with no context.” What a great way of telling people you only followed them for the followback—awesome job guys, girls, most anyone trying to get attention for anything. Don’t give that potential audience even the chance of an illusion that they themselves are interesting, cool plan.

Anyway, I kinda lost interest in following most sites very closely, and haven’t even looked at most of the major lists. So there’s none of that recapping the entire internet nonsense I used to do. And I haven’t lost interest in buying large amounts of new music, but I have lost a lot of time and money this year doing other things. Like studying Japanese more seriously. That’s a big one. And once you step off the internet content train for a bit you start remembering things you used to enjoy like books, and movies. Really just one of those things at a time, for a couple hours at a time. That’s cool. And shows. And playing music. That’s maybe even better. For part of this I actually had some extra money because my health insurance dropped me and then I got on Obamacare, so I enrolled in a real Japanese class, bought some tickets to shows I would not have seen otherwise, and a cheap 7-string. Then I lost one of my jobs and now I’m broke again until I figure out something new. But that got me out of a hell of a rut. I got myself into a whole new rut of watching old anime and horror movies, but who are you to judge?

Point is, there’s not much to go through here. There’s my favorite 10 records this year, and then 10 more records and change, and we’re done here. For now.

Oh, I almost forgot, I’ve been saving this:

There’s also a downside. But I forget what that is, because I forgot to leave a note with this draft. (Always leave a note.) Wait, it’s forgetting stuff you liked. Not a problem this time. Not really a problem for me at all, because in “the game” (…) of music writing, I’m nobody, and I’m fine with that. I’m just a long-winded message boarder.

The List

  1. Cibo Matto | Hotel Valentine

    Didn’t expect this to be this good. Heaviest rotation. Some people seem hung up on the fact that they are like 50. Lotta bands from the 90s are 50 now. But wait, that means they were like 35 then. I don’t remember anyone listening to Fugazi and saying, “fuck these old dudes”. People said different things, but nobody said that. GOOD RECORD.

  2. Shellac | Dude Incredible

    New Shellac album is always going on the list. They are the Motorhead of indie rock. More consistent, even. And younger. Yes, 2 90s bands at the top. I am from the 90s. Gotta be from somewhere.

  3. Tombs | Savage Gold

    Got into this more than the last one, which was great, but the songs clicked for me here better and great production by Eric Rutan. I love how it opens with that delay/pitch shifted riff. Good opening riff makes you put the album on again and again.

  4. Agalloch | The Serpent and the Sphere

    I was not into this band much previously, but I went to see them for the hell of it and dug it. So I got this album on cassette and drove around all summer in a car with only a cassette player and no air and roll-up windows. (The car had air, but I refused to turn it on. I was trying to remember how much the 80s sucked. The only other cassette I had in the car was Black Flag’s In My Head. Try it. You will not be pleasantly surprised. I did this for months until I broke out my Pizzicato Five dubs.) On repeat, the album puts you in kind of a trance. Of the albums floating around that mix Black Metal with dreamy post-rock/shoegaze vibe, I like this one best.

  5. Mastodon | Once More ‘Round the Sun

    I still love Mastodon even if they don’t always make an album of the year. What else can you say. I’m not that good at reviewing records? You could say that.

  6. Emerald Four | Nothing Can Hurt Me

    Japanese witchhouse or whatever thankfully going strong because Purity Ring is normcore now or whatever, I have no idea what’s going on, this is a chill record.

  7. Boris | Noise

    This was supposed to be the ultimate Boris record whatever that means and I don’t think it is, but it’s pretty cool. I got the deluxe version on iTunes that has some live bonus tracks. In some cases, for some reasons, I think Boris is better live than on record. These are not those cases. Do not buy the deluxe version. There’s youtube vids you could rip with better quality. They need to get a good live recording that gets all the bass in somehow, that would be the ultimate Boris record.

  8. Marty Friedman | Inferno

    I like Marty Friedman, he’s really good at playing guitar. I could do without the vocal tracks on his albums, but these ones are not completely terrible. So maybe this is really the best Marty Friedman record ever, if you don’t count Tokyo Jukebox. I do.

  9. Triptykon | Melana Chasmata

    Oh man, this should be higher right? Just listening again. Got the CD for the art but only heard it so many times. Is this album cover the last thing H.R. Giger did? End of an era right here.
    (Does this band’s name come from the Transformer, because I forgot all about that and just noticed it.)

  10. Behemoth | The Satanist

    Technically and musically you’d have to say this is the best Behemoth album, where they finally brought the very mechanical blackened death metal into back the more organic realm of their earliest material. But I actually like the previous few that border on an industrial death metal sound, those are always gonna be my favorite. And I don’t care about the whole taking Satanism thing seriously, I prefer the vaguely sinister stuff of previous years. There’s been a lot of talk with these bands along the lines of, “I don’t agree with it, but you have to respect their religious beliefs.” Nah you don’t. It’s metal. The whole appeal was not respecting religious beliefs I thought. When you keep it on that level, I’m into it. When it’s on that Tom G. Warrior level when it’s really about depression and death, and no one knowing anything, I’m into it. Thankfully when interviewed, the members of the band seem very politically naive so they aren’t really promoting some fascist agenda, but you see where I’m going where I’m fully not into it. You gotta see there’s like a potential overlap there. I think right in that edge space is a lot of potential for great art, but sincerity can be a problem in that area. Great artists are not necessarily great thinkers.

Best Single/EP

  • Namie Amuro | Tsuki

    This is technically a single for a completely forgettable ballad. It’s the b-sides that made this an esstianal purchase for me. (Which I bought the last album for without checking the playlist, haha.) In the twisted alternate reality my own brain, putting nonsense lyrics on top of already successful EDM tracks equal the biggest pop songs of the year. In the real world they exist in an aesthetic no man’s land; not pop enough to be truly Pop, not original enough to be critically praised. I feel like this is simply every ele’s loss. There’s some cool sounds coming out of EDM, but it’s not enough to hold my attention since I don’t go to clubs and I’ve never done Ecstasy. Maybe this is my loss, but I’m not about to start. What, I’m a walking question mark that can go in any direction at any time? No. There’s gotta be a topline to actually listen to.

Videos

Not doing a best of videos this year. Got over a hundred in my Watch Later queue, and prefer to dole them out in a non-linear fashion on tumblr anyway. I do have a public playlist of J-pop/rock vids that I’ve been adding to for a while, but I haven’t kept track of what came out this year.

The Other List

  • Alto! | S/t

    Just a cool instrumental post-rock album I heard on Jon Solomon’s show and it came out on his label. Might’ve forgot about it otherwise. It’s kinda like King Crimson x krautrock. Not gonna change your life but if you are ordering other stuff from there which you should of course it’s a great add-on. Oh, you can d/l it free on bandcamp, sure you can do that too. I’m not telling you how to live.

  • Anaal Nathrakh | Desideratum

    This band started out as one of the the most extreme bands ever and just when you think they can’t get any more extreme…they don’t actually. Kinda plateaus. I happen to like this kind of plateau but it is what it is. Actually I think they peaked on 2004’s Domine Non Es Dignus, when they were going back-and-forth with some clean Power Viking Chorus Metal vocals. Now that was crazy. There was some kind of contrast.
    And yo, I did not hear this other album that came out this year also call Desideratum, but I gotta mention it, cause even the covers are similar in the same half-assed way. Really guys? Metal community? Gotta do better than this.

  • The Austerity Program | Beyond Calculation

    I like this band but the thing with the no song names is too much for me, or rather, not enough. Also, if you put this on your list the same year a Shellac album came out but didn’t include the Shellac kiiiinda fuck yourself?

  • Nader Sadek | The Malefic: Chapter III

    So this art project is a really real death metal band now, with some awesome players, and I got it for free with my Decibel sub. Not much to complain about, sounds great, hits the perfect sweet spot of how this music should sound, even Flo Mounier on drums! Can’t really stand post-Lord Word Cryptopsy, so that is great to hear. The songs just didn’t stick for me so not many spins. Hold on, is there another way for people to get this thing? I’m just going to link to the guy’s website and it has to turn up there eventually.

  • The Roots | …And Then You Shoot Your Cousin

    I had this theory that my life started going off track when I stopped buying Roots albums as they came out. This album doesn’t help and I’m pretty sure now it’s a coincidence. But if you have any interest in making music with some kind of integrity and also be a success and you don’t pay attention to the Roots you’re dumb. I literally feel stupid because this album is so high-minded I don’t even get it as a long term fan. All you have to do is play live five nights a week on national TV and you can make whatever album you want.

  • Run the Jewels | RTJ2

    I was late really getting into the first one, which I listened to a lot this year until this one came out; it didn’t really hit me the same way. People thought it was better or more extreme…there was more jokes if anything. I’m not putting it down cause this is a great group, it just didn’t top one for me.

  • Charisma.com | DIStopping

    This group came out kinda like they were the anti-Halcali: they write and produce their own tunes and actually know something about music. I love Halcali but they went off the rails when they lost their producers. Anyway, on this album they do a ballad. Halcali ballads are sweet. Those girls are sweet. These girls are not sweet, it’s kinda the whole concept. So it’s obviously forced. There’s some good tunes, but that threw the record for me. Like they really are not in control of the thing which is a shame.

  • Judas Priest | Redeemer of Souls

    Maybe this could’ve bumped Marty Friedman off the top 10 if I got to it before this week. Nah, what am I thinking…Marty? I think it might be better than the Marty record in fact. But I’ve never been a proper Priest fan. I know all those old records are good, but I haven’t got most of ’em. I watched the Anvil movie from Netflix this year finally and it was cool, I respect those guys on some level, but they overhyped them being influential, I thought. People who were never really in bands seem to be inspired by it because they could see themselves being one of those dudes, I was a little scared cause I could see myself being one of those dudes. I love playing music, but I would rather listen to Priest and have some other decent job than play in a band that is almost not quite nearly as good as Priest and work endless shit jobs. I mean for 30 years? Do people not in bands realize how many times you have to hear your own songs as you play them? Lotta ear time.

  • Merkebah | Moloch

    I instantly thought of this as a top 10er upon first listen, forgetting at least that many good records had come out already. I do not remember how I heard of this, maybe just the name of the album caught me because I used to be obsessed with Ginsberg’s Howl. There’s also (probably several) bands named Moloch, but that seemed to be pushing it too far. An album about Moloch on the other hand is something I can get behind. Even better, it’s instrumental metal with a sax. Maybe my favorite example yet as far as the playing of the instrument. There’s no sense of novelty about it, there’s serious playing here. And there’s actually a sense of swing to the music.

  • Jute Gyte | Vast Chains

    Oh man, this is some creepy shit. So many metal albums come out in a year, and this did not even make my listening list because I only listened to it once on my laptop way in the beginning of the year, but once was enough to remember it and that alone should say something. This is some Grade A Bad Mood Sonic Youth atonal dissonance with a Satanic twist to it; it’s really unfortunate they don’t have a name people can remember, that’s the only tough part. Most bands this far off normal notes and scales either don’t really know what they are doing, are joking, or doing some kind of chaotic jamming thing. And it’s usually a lo-fi affair. I’m not sure what “it” is for these guys and I don’t wanna know, but these guys mean it and every part is clearly composed and recorded. Now I feel like a wimp for not putting in the top 10, right? But I’m really only listening to it for a second time right now. That’s really gotta be taken into effect for a personal list.

    Also there was the Shonen Knife album I already wrote about.

    And I have to mention the Relapse Sampler so I can cross it off my to-do list. Had to give this a close listen just to make sure I wasn’t stupidly missing something great (at least that was on Relapse), but I really think Tombs is the best thing they put out this year.

Old Records

  • Black Sabbath | Complete Albums Box (1970-1978)

    Holy shit, I listened the hell of of this. Never paid much attention past the first four, which I did not have full copies of.

  • Bottomless Pit | [all of them]

    I don’t feel like I’m qualified to write about this band. This should be every smart person’s favorite band. I mean smarter than me. If they were really smart I guess they would already be listening to them, so those are the smartest people but I mean, there’s gotta be a lot of people in the smarter than me, not as smart as those people range. And it’s not like a requirement. It’s not exactly Stockhausen. It’s not difficult music, it’s a rock band.

  • OOIOO | Gamel

    I guess the American release came out this year so it’s on some lists now, but it’s over a year old in Japan. Really need to talk about this one in depth because of the tuning implications. Before the world melts or explodes or we all kill each other.

Japan-related Disappointments (Non-political)

  • New FLiP but it’s boring
  • Kyary & Perfume Singing in English doesn’t quite work (yet?)
  • New Perfume Singles were kinda weak
  • tricot lost their drummer and is corny now
  • Sugar’s Campaign full album is…I dunno yet.
  • Still really expensive to get there; far away

I think things will work out. Before, you know. Ultimately.

That was kinda of a downer to end with how about Best Live Shows

  1. Pig Destroyer/Tombs/Fight Amp@First Unitarian
  2. Perfume@the Hammerstein
  3. Cibo Matto/Deerhoof@Union Transfer
  4. Agalloch/Vektor/Jex Thoth@Underground Arts
  5. Sleep@Union Transfer
  6. OOIOO@Johnny Brenda’s
  7. Morning Musume@Best Buy

Shit that’s everything.

Obliquior!

%

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

1 Comment

Immortal | Battles In the North

Rain today. Starting a story with the weather in generally a terrible idea, but this is not a story, it’s a record review. There’s no rules for record reviews. People don’t even read them most of the time. So you see there is no problem.

I think if you don’t like Immortal you don’t really like Black Metal. Maybe you like Mayhem better or Emperor or Darkthrone, I’ll give you that, but most of that stuff that is ambient and folky is not even Metal. It’s ok to not like Metal, I guess. It’s like if you only have the Rick Rubin Johnny Cash albums, you probably don’t really like country music. It’s fine. Or if the only rap albums you have are by Eminem and the Beastie Boys. Wait, then you are a racist, that’s not fine. I’m getting off track.

Two standout features of this album are the chaotic drumming and abrupt cutoffs of the songs. The drumming I love. Plenty of classic metal albums are pretty off the grid, but this was a new style at the time where the guitars and drums often are not at all locked together. The first reaction to this is that it’s humorously terrible, like the group’s appearance. But I got into it. I’m into their whole thing. Some people get into Black Metal and find themselves apologizing for Nazis and murderers—I like the getups, man. I’m taking my stand and that’s that. I’m thinking the ends of the songs sounded a lot better on tape back in the day, with the songs plopping nicely into a pillow of hiss. But as pristine digital files, it sounds broken, like the download transfer got cut off. Most of the lyrics are incomprehensible except for the title of the song, which is great, especially when you’ve got great song titles. One notable exception is the end of Moonrise Fields of Sorrow:

give unto meeee never-ending snowfallll

Yeah man, bring it on. I can deal with this nonsense forever. I just need the soundtrack and I’m good. It used to be more of a metaphor, seemingly endless precipitation merely a stand-in for a long period of depression. But despite many rational reasons, I have not been depressed lately, and merely have to contend with the 3-dimensional horrors of physical reality. Cursed Realms of the Winterdemons, if you will. No big deal. Seasons change, and with them new horrors. That’s maybe a little dramatic. I’m outside for part of the day every single day because it’s what you have to deal with dogs and that’s just what you have to do. Not really my choice, but I’m not getting my bike out anymore, so it’s good to have a reason to get out in the weather everyday. People around here seem to only go outside on purpose when it hits room temperature, and most are dumbfounded by a hello. Far grimmer than I. Anywho, I have taken great inspiration from the Black Metal Demonlords to think of extremity and discomfort in weather akin to the same in music: something to perhaps revel in and get into.

And it’s over in 36 minutes. Perfect. If I want more I put it on repeat but I try not to stay out that long. %

$5 on Amazon mp3, or get the used CD/vinyl for 50?

, , , , ,

2 Comments

GWAR | Scumdogs of the Universe

Scumdogs on CDThisssssssszzzzzzzzsssssssssszzzssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss is not the only or last GWAR album that I have purchased, but it’s the only one I currently own. I sold the others a while ago, and haven’t kept up with the new ones for at least a decade. Can’t say I regret it all that that much, but there are a couple things I do regret—1: repairing my keyboard at the beginning of the draft and just leaving it in there like people would think it was funny or something. There’s nothing funny about that. But what can you do, there’s no going back, man. 2: Looking up the wiki for the album after I had most of the thing written in my head. This might not seem like a big deal, but I’ve wasted precious mental real estate assembling my hard-won observations over the years, when all has been previously laid out in the plainest of prose. Depressing.

And why did it take me so long to notice the Al Jourgensen and Paul Barker of Ministry co-produced? (They are actually credited with their real names if you read all the fine print, unlike any member of the band.) But who is this mysterious “Ron Goudie”? Hoho, Wikipedia, you can tell everyone what they already know but remove what we don’t. I’ve got the info of Ron Goudie alright, that you think you can hide! Turns out he is a guy. Some kind of musician. Well.

Wait, there’s probably something I can say about this besides trivia. It’s good, right? In my opinion? Yeah, it’s the best. There’s some good songs on the other albums but this is the only real classic full album. Look, I compared Gwar to Mastodon and maybe it averages out, like Gwar is 80% live experience 20% album and Mastodon is the reverse, but it’s kinda the same thing. BUT. IS. IT. ?. Oh, I see what’s going on here. You’re trying to get me to admit that Gwar’s songs are not that good and it’s basically a joke band. Mastodon is not a joke band. What kind of asshole would even suggest that.

I will not admit it. I do not think it’s true. The good songs on this album are as good as anybody’s. They are completely credible Metal songs. At least the one’s Brockie sings. He was a real guy, man. And non-Metal people will praise the band at a distance, like, “they play live in those rubber suits every night, that’s dedication, gotta give those guys credit”…because the problem for some people is the authenticity vs. a regular clothes-wearing, non-pretending-to-be-space-aliens band like Mastodon.

And let’s talk about the artwork for a second. Wiki’s got nothing to say about that. In addition to everything else, there was also a Gwar comicbook that they sold at their shows. I was always too broke and covered in fake bodily fluids to get a copy. The integration of that art to the inside of the album was reason alone to hold onto it. I love the super-deformed versions on the characters and the bios. (“Balsac the Jaws of Death: Has a beartrap for a face, but why?”)

But there are the songs. Yes. I love the songs. There are the obvious joke songs: NWA take-off The Salaminizer, what I’m going to call a “spoken-word piece” Slaughterama, and show-stopper, Sexecutioner. These tracks may not hold up in the harsh glare of adulthood. They may have been the only tracks you have heard. And probably Sick of You. That was like, a single.

So they do these dumb(?) singalongs and these joke songs. Why do I take them seriously?

Take a song with fairly typical Metal lyrics like The Years Without Light. If they made a whole album of songs like this it would be better than most Anthrax albums, admit it. 95% of Thrash albums are attitude and stringing riffs together, most bands don’t always try make each song so individual and able to stand on its own. Thr broken gallop beat, the vocal cadence, it’s great.

Then you’ve got the songs like Maggots, King Queen, and Horror of Yig, my personal favorites, incorporating theatrical flourishes and sound effects that take you into the world of their unique live experience, but never leaving the musical world of Metal. Except for the bagpipes, which Korn stole. I don’t get the reason for either, but I like the instrument. Is there some kind of gay connotation? There’s a lot of gay references on the album that I don’t get why they’re there. (The printed lyrics are annotated by a member of “The Morality Squad” with things like “shocking!”) Maybe the live show originally had Oderus cross-dressing? If so they dropped that by the time I saw them in…’97, w/ the Misfits. And Mephiskapheles. And Earth Crisis?!? That was a thing that happened.

Then you’ve got (not in this order) Vlad the Impaler, Love Surgery and Death Pod, all solid standards. Black and Huge has the most obvious Ministry-like touches, with porn movie samples, not so obviously dropped in there, but woven into the texture, or perhaps layered, like a delicious industrial metal lasagna. Possibly the least defensible lyrics, because they don’t really make enough sense to be offensive. I’m not going to try to explain someone else’s in-joke. This one and album closer Cool Place to Park, a total vocal departure sung in high screams by Beefcake, always puzzled me as far fitting into the concept of the album. It all ends with the sound of sinking underwater. Maybe I need to read more Lovecraft.

Buy it on Amazon?
Donate to the Dave Brockie Foundation or buy a t-shirt in an unresonable size b/c you waited too long

%

, , , , , , , ,

2 Comments